Tuesday, November 29, 2011


You ever just have one of those days where you feel invisible? Well for me it's just been one of those months. I've struggled with who I am and what I believe in, who I stand for. About three weeks ago I did something that a part of me really wishes I hadn't done, but at the same time I knew was the right thing to do. I feel like I've lost one of my best friends but I'm not sure. It sounds stupid because the person won't even talk to me, but because of that I still hold onto that vain hope that things could return to normal. Deep down I know it's not true, not possible, but I still hope and wish. It's because of this person, or even these people that I feel invisible. I can stand in the same room and talk to the same people and carry on the same as them, but unless I ask them a direct question then they won't acknowledge that I'm there. Hell, that doesn't even work half the time as I found out today. And you know I have to sit and wonder to myself why I would want to have friends like these? And then I think back on the times when they didn't act like this. When they were some of the kindest, goofiest, and sweetest people I knew. The times that I cherished with them weren't when they were talking about people or yelling or cursing or acting a fool. It was the rides we took together, the conversations that meant something, the little things they did that made me want to better myself... But now all that is gone and I'm invisible.

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